Sheep Shagger Apron $43
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From overseas in the UK, where this kind of humor still predominates, we present the Sheep Shagger Apron. Tending to the flock can get quite lonely in those rolling hills of England, Ireland, and Scotland, and this apron is a not-so-subtle reminder of the shephard's classic remedy. These are currently available at NeedAPresent.com where they are 11.99 with 9.99 shipping (in pounds). That translates into roughly $43.50 to get this baaaahhhhd-behavior apron shipped to your door.
This Water Powered Clock drops from $12.99 to a price low of $7.99 at ThinkGeek. It features translucent blue siding with a mirrored front, only requires water to operate, and the back water reservoirs can be used to hold flowers. Shipping starts around $5.94 or is free with any $75 order. There is no sales tax (except FL, OH, VA).